The Tipping Glass » Kyle

The long, dramatic ratings death of ‘man day’

Kyle — Wed, 21 Apr 2010 20:55:03 +0000

Whatever happened to man day? What happened to that enviable Saturday late each April, when the weather warms, and the sun coaxes you into shorts and a T-shirt. When you and the boys head out to the grocery store to round up as much cheap beer and cheaper shrink-wrapped meat as you can fit in the cart. Where you get together with all those you loved to waste time with, and waste away the day watching the most unexciting, dry sports broadcast, that no true football fan can miss. Whatever happened to that?

It’s ironic, really, that booming broadcast ratings actually killed ‘man day,’ and the NFL Draft could become the victim of its own puzzling popularity this year. Sadly, it will take ‘man day’ down with it. This year, the NFL Draft moves to prime-time in NYC (you’ve probably heard Rihanna singing about it on the ESPN promo), and first round coverage moves to Thursday night. Thursday? Just like that, the all-day man tradition that was Draft Saturday is no more.

Why is it that we love the NFL Draft so much? Do we? Or are we just fooled into it? Each year, when all of the pageantry of the Big Dance fades into obscurity, and the Masters champion donning the fabled green jacket slips from front page, we enter a sort of sports vacuum that sucks the life out of the average sports nut. Our Saturdays—filled for months with a steady diet of consistent college action—are suddenly empty. Our Sundays—dominated for so long by the NFL, and held over by March Madness and the Masters—are swiftly vacated.

Of course there are sports options out there. There is baseball, but lets face it, it’s April. There are at least 150-some games still to be played in the MLB regular season in April, and I think most of the players care as much as the casual fan does about what happens that month. The hockey season ends and the playoffs begin, but for most fans the NHL is a fair-weather home team sport. If you don’t have a horse in that race, you aren’t watching. No offense intended—I’m one of those fans. Basketball, I would say, falls into that category too. Either way, hockey and basketball playoffs are terribly drawn out, and span months. The early rounds of both generally don’t draw huge TV ratings. This is evidenced by the fact that they air on Versus and TBS, respectively. I’m generalizing here, of course, but the truth of the matter is, the majority of sports fans are left high and dry this time of year.

It was a fundamental problem for the media outlets that cover the sports industry. What do you publish in the sports dead zone? It was a problem that Sports Illustrated solved with bikinis and body paint; a problem that ESPN solved this year with Tiger Woods; and a problem that the NFL capitalized on years ago by broadcasting the draft.

The NFL Draft traditionally spans the course of one weekend in April, but it manages to create buzz that radiates for months following the Super Bowl, and through the summer. Ratings for the draft have skyrocketed in the past several years, and it now has a media following unlike any other professional event. ESPN has on-staff draft analysts like Mel Kiper Jr. who could literally talk about the draft until their heads swelled and they hyperventilated. It’s a good thing too.

At face value, the NFL draft is the most boring, drab sports event that you could ever draw up on paper. Fifteen minutes of speculative babble, followed by five minutes of analysis on who each team finally selected—rewind and repeat for three days. It is an event tailor-made for next day newspaper coverage, where some poor schmuck reporter would have to sit through eight painful hours of the draft and put it all into one consolidated list for the interested public. But in the age of instantaneous news, and real-time split-second updates, live coverage of the draft has not just succeeded, it has exploded.

The NFL and ESPN are on a hot streak with draft coverage. Each year’s ratings somehow continue to eclipse the previous, and each year the promos and hype grow in kind. College stars become NFL celebrities before they’ve played a professional down, and first round contracts balloon to levels that leave grizzled NFL vets scratching their heads. It is the over-marketed, under-substanced, NFL equivalent of the late-90’s tech stock bubble.

With all of the recent success of the draft, the move to prime-time might seem a logical step, but I fear the NFL is pushing its luck. My question is simple: is it the event or the traditions people create around it that make the draft so popular? The NFL should be familiar with this paradox. Look no further than the Super Bowl. Not all of the 160-something million people who watched the Super Bowl this year were football fans, but they all wound up at some sort of Super Bowl gathering. It’s the tradition, and not necessarily the event, that makes it so popular. In that sense, moving the first round to Thursday, covering the second and third rounds in prime-time Friday, and airing only late-round coverage on Saturday, could backfire.

To me the draft is not a prime-time event to begin with. It is a monotonous yet interesting backdrop to ‘man day.’ The grill, man-time, and the ice-cold beverages fill the dead space of draft day nicely. It’s not a Friday night kind of event (much less, Thursday), it’s the kind of event suited for a long, sunny, lazy Saturday with the guys.

Who knows, maybe the ratings will spike yet again, and the NFL will flex its proud marketing muscles one more time. Hell, I’ll probably still watch begrudgingly. But one thing is for certain, for me the draft will never be the same if this format holds. Commercialized and split up to appease the network execs, it looses its flavor. And on Saturday, I fear the fourth round and all that come after it will be tough to swallow, even if you washed it down with cheap beer and steak.

This is an awesome post from The Tipping Glass

The long, dramatic ratings death of ‘man day’

Dearest Washington

Kyle — Fri, 26 Mar 2010 14:13:27 +0000

Ladies and Gentlemen, boys and girls, children of all ages, stand and behold. A brisk arctic wind permeated the very gates of hell Tuesday: Washington actually did something.

This isn’t a partisan piece. Neither an indictment nor an endorsement. Merely an observation that for once, as if by magic, something actually happened in a place where for so long nothing has. For that I would like to eloquently congratulate you, Congress, for your accomplishment. For finally achieving what you had ceased for so long to actually do: anything.

I ask you, Congress, what does it say about you? What does it say about you when the average constituent is so fed up with your politics that your policies become irrelevant? What does it mean when this citizen, at least, is so dissatisfied with the status quo—where the argument becomes more important than the issue—that he is satisfied with simply something, anything, happening?

Congratulations, Congress. On your watch, in the backdrop of your bickering, we have soldiered headlong into the most stifling recession since the great one. We have trudged-on through deserts, and mountains, and poppy fields in wars on two fronts. Seen natural and economic disasters come and loom on our doorsteps, and at our dining room tables.

For us, the budget is as real as the check we stretch to meet it. For us, deficits accrue at 16% annually, and surpluses appreciate at two-and-a-half. For us, there will be no bail-out; no six-figure bonus. For us, inaction is not an option.

So allow me to commend you, Washington, for getting back to work. And allow me to remind you that for many, the task of getting back to work is far more daunting than putting Parliamentary tactics into action. For many, your bitter partisan differences would be inconsequential, were they not the biggest obstacle between some of your citizens and a sustainable future.

And so again, as a nation, we find ourselves at a crossroads. A place where the future looks uncertain, and how we got here, and where to go, become equally difficult to ascertain. Remember that in these moments in history—not necessarily the more stable ones—great things have been done. Great problems have been met with great ideas. Great men have been born of Great Depressions.

Remember that in the long run, regardless of where you stand on the issues, what truly matters is that we somehow work together toward something better. To fix what is broken. To get back to work.

And so, don’t laud yourself Washington. Don’t revel in whatever victories or defeat you’ve claimed. There’s no time for glory speeches or ticker-tape parades. No time for wrangling with the politics of ill will. No time to stand back and ponder your legacy and what this might mean in its scope. America is out of time and patients for politics. It’s time now, to get back to work.

This is an awesome post from The Tipping Glass

Dearest Washington

No related posts.

This is Madness! 2010 March Madness Preview

Kyle — Fri, 12 Mar 2010 19:48:20 +0000

2nd Round Recap & 3rd Round Preview

Kyle: You wanted madness? Well you got it this year, my friends. With the first two rounds over and just about every bracket in the country busted, at this point the office pool is becoming a battle of attrition. It has been upset city so far, and if your bracket looks anything like mine, you only open it to get a laugh anymore. So far we’ve seen the #1 overall Kansas drop to #9 seed, Northern Iowa. We saw a 10 seed, St. Mary’s, plow through my Cinderella pick: Richmond and #2 Villanova. And we’ve got an Ivy League team in the sweet 16? What?

Put it this way, if your bracket isn’t covered in scratch-outs and red ink at this point, I’m amazed. You win. I think Yahoo Sports does a million-dollar prize for anyone with a perfect bracket each year. They ought to double it this year. Hell, triple it, no one picked this. I promise. Your prize money is safe, Yahoo.

Josh: I was at a wedding Saturday afternoon. What self-respecting man plans a wedding on March Madness weekend? Seriously?? A very selfish move. My eyes were glued on espn.com on my iPhone instead of the bride walking down the aisle.

I must come clean. Out of 12 people on my Yahoo tournament, I am dead last. I was destroyed this weekend, as I’m sure millions of others were. Seriously, who, beisdes Northern Iowa alumni, picked the upset? “WOW” is the only way to describe this tournament so far.

Kyle: I’m with you, unfortunately, on the bracket standings. With a whopping 89 possible points ahead of me, I’m second from the bottom in mine. Just ahead of the guy who didn’t fill out his bracket, and scores zeroes across the board. Hopefully no one took our commentary into consideration when filling out their brackets… Yeah, sorry about that. But when the overall leader on Yahoo’s top 50 has Kansas as his winner, at least you know you’re not alone.

No shortage of close games, Cinderella’s, and story lines this year. I have to say that this has been one of the most entertaining tournaments in recent memory. Which of the surprise sweet 16 entries has impressed you most?

Josh: Without a doubt it’s gotta be Northern Iowa. This is not only the biggest upset of the tournament, it’s the biggest upset in YEARS. The game they put together builds the kind of momentum that teams ride to the championship. And, not to sound like a wet blanket, I missed it because of a wedding. The open bar is all that saved me.

With one #1 seed down, what top seed do you see falling out of the tournament in this round?

Kyle: Call me crazy, but I have Baylor on upset alert. As upsets go, you’re right, you can’t match Northern Iowa over Kansas, but I think I’ve been more impressed with St. Mary’s overall. No one has had anything close to an answer to Omar Samhan, St. Mary’s center. He has been the most dominant inside player of the tournament by a long shot. At one point Villanova had Samhan in foul trouble early after he’d put them through the meat grinder for the entire first half. Nova went on a little run, and St. Mary’s coach rolled the dice and put Samhan back in. Two possessions, four points, less than 30 seconds played. The crowd subsided and Samhan returned to the bench. It’s been just that easy. Baylor is quick but a bit undersized. I look for Samhan to have a huge game again in Houston, unless Baylor can get him in serious foul trouble early.

Josh: With the first part of the madness over, let’s look toward the future. I had Kansas winning it all. Oops. What’s your pick now for the championship game?

I’m going to go with Syracuse and Kentucky. Both have been playing solid games, and seem to be on a roll right now.

Kyle: Kentucky has been absolutely dominant in it’s first two games, and I expect that to earn them a match-up with Duke in the Final Four. Then comes the age old question: do you take the amazingly dominant, but incredibly young talent of the Wildcats, or the tournament-tested grizzled veteran wisdom of the Blue Devils? I’m going with Kentucky.

As for the other side of the bracket I’m going to take an upset (which has been a pitifully unsuccessful strategy for me so far this tournament, but why stop now?). I’m taking Ohio State over Syracuse in a close one in the Final Four.

Josh: Well, hopefully we’ll both be closer to our new predictions than our old ones. I’d like to say I’m embarrased by my previous picks, but hey, when over half the country’s brackets were busted by one upset? At least I know I’m not alone. I’m looking forward to catching the Sweet 16 this week, and we’ll (hopefully) be back with better news and unshattered confidence after this next round.

1st Round

Kyle: Alright, alright, let me begin by officially removing my foot from my mouth. So, Maryland drops in the first round of the ACC tourney and still somehow winds up with a 4 seed, WVU takes the Big East after all and still doesn’t get the #1, and as far as I can gather not a single coin thrown at the opposing bench from the WVU section. I make no apologies for false predictions–I just blame reality for not pulling through for me.

That said, tell me Josh, which region do you think could be the toughest?

Josh: My motto for all of my NFL picks is the same as the great Gregg Easterbrook at ESPN: All Predictions Wrong, or Your Money Back. That should probably be the Tipping Glass mantra. I’ll tell you who got a great deal in all this: Syracuse. I know college students travel all over the country to see their team play, but Buffalo is only a few hours away from Syracuse, so expect those games to shake the roof off the HSBC Arena. As for the toughest region, it’s gotta be the Midwest. Kansas, Ohio State, Georgetown, Maryland…should I go on?

Kyle: Yeah, the Midwest is absolutely brutal. Congratulations, Kansas, for all of your hard work this season–finishing with a resume that dominates every other team in the field–you have earned the top spot in the most difficult bracket I have ever seen in the tournament…honestly. When I was watching the selection show I was excited when I saw that Maryland landed the #4. Then I saw that our 2nd round game would likely be vs. Michigan St. Then I saw that Georgetown, Tennessee, Ohio State, OK State, and oh yeah, Kansas was in our region. I wasn’t excited anymore. It is going to take a monumental effort for any of the above teams to make it through that bracket. The scary thing is, they are all capable.

Josh: Ok enough with the high seeds. What teams do you see the most potential to bust brackets all over the country?

Kyle: I think Tennessee at a #6 seed is extremely dangerous. The fact that they wound up at a 6 is a crime. The big question will be can they get by Georgetown. That one is a coin flip for me, but I think whoever takes that one will snipe Ohio State in the following round. As for the bracket busters, it all comes down to how the brackets line up, and I say the South and West set up pretty nicely for Cinderellas.

I’ll be watching #7 Richmond and #13 Sienna in the South. I would definitely say this is the weakest bracket overall, which makes me want to drive to Durham and puke on Cameron Indoor. How the fourth #1 seed ends up with the easiest road in the tourney baffles me.

As for the West, keep your eye on #12 UTEP. This pick has become a bit too popular to make me comfortable with it, but they are a strong team and potentially their toughest match up in the first two rounds is a Vanderbilt team that has not been impressive lately.

Who are you picking for your 12/5 upset?

Josh: I hate picking 12/5s…But if I had to, it would be UTEP. However, I think the biggest “upset” will be Sienna over Purdue. Remember what I said last time about a team having one star player who takes over the tournament? That was Robbie Hummel, who was lost to an ACL tear in February. Look at the 69-42 whipping by Minnesota in the Big Ten Semifinals as evidence. As for any other bottom dwellers? I recently read that a #3 seed or higher hasn’t lost in the first round since 2006. With the strength at the top, I can’t see that trend turning around this year.

History means a lot in these tournaments, but I still love my ex-girlfriend’s approach of filling out her bracket based on the uniform colors and mascots. No matter how much research I’d do beforehand, she ends up beating me. That’s how you fill out your bracket, right Kyle?

Kyle: True, history does mean a lot, but as they say on Wall Street, “past performance is no guarantee of future results.” So maybe, just maybe, your statistical fortitude will outmatch your ex-gf’s uniform critiques this year, and all will be right with the world. If you looked at the results of my brackets from the last two years, you might think that the uniform index would be a more sound approach than whatever I’ve used. I just barely edged out a victory over my wife’s bracket last year. She is also a fan of the uniform index. The NCAA tournament, for whatever reason, is the great sports knowledge equalizer. The more you know, the more chance you have to over-think it. I tried not to think about it at all this year. Filled out my bracket in about 90 seconds and named it “Gary Williams’ Sweating Zoo.” It is my grand experiment. I am currently in first place, and I expect that to hold true at least until Thursday morning. Let the games begin!

—

Kyle: And so it begins… Productivity in workplaces around the country takes a nosedive, brackets are filled out and busted, Cinderella’s are crowned and spoiled, pride is tested, trash is talked, and unlike NCAA football, a true champion is decided on the playing surface. It is March Madness, and it is the best championship format in sports as far as I’m concerned. So check your work browser for page restrictions, and keep your trigger-finger on the “boss button.” It’s tourney time baby.

Let’s talk seeding. Josh, who do you have as your number ones?

Josh: This is definitely one of my favorite sporting events of the year. Any time you have an enormous single-elimination tournament you’re in for some amazing upsets, triple-OT heartbreakers, and buzzer-beaters. Let’s cut to the chase. Kansas will always have a place in my memory with an amazing overtime winner that went past midnight a few years ago to reach the Final Four. They’re my pick to win it all. As for the other number one seeds, I’ll say Syracuse, Duke, and Kentucky with possibly West Virginia being a surprise.

Kyle: Going with the Cuse, eh? I totally would have been with you up until I saw them fall so flat in their first game of the Big East tourney against Georgetown, but I think that only lends itself to the strength of the conference, and for that I guess I’ll concede and agree. They probably will still hold on to the #1, but that will knock them down to the final #1, and stick them in a tough bracket. You can’t say enough about the depth and strength of the Big East this year. When a two-game buy in the conference tournament earns you a first game vs. #22 Georgetown, you know you’ve got a strong conference there. I agree with your other #1’s too, with Kansas as the #1 overall. I don’t think there will be a lot of debate over those slots this year. I highly doubt WVU will make a run at it though. I haven’t been all that impressed with what I’ve seen of them, honestly. The only way I see them sneeking into a #1 is if they win the Big East tourney. And I’m not sure their fans will come with enough quarters in their pockets to make that happen.

What happened to the ACC this year?

Josh: Maybe all that snow the East Coast got slammed with in February had an effect on them? I still think Duke can be a force, but I don’t see anyone in the ACC being an actual contender. And Michael Jordon would be rolling in his grave (if he was dead…) at how his Alma Matter has faired this year.

When it comes to the NCAA Tournament, a lot of times it only takes one guy to take over a team and lead them on a hot streak. We saw it with Carmelo Anthony a few years ago. He took most of the year to find his stride, but once the tourney hit, he led Syracuse to the championship and was on his way to the NBA. If you had to pick, who do you think will be the MVP this year?

Kyle: No doubt, Roy Williams and Carolina should be ashamed of themselves this year. Full disclosure: I graduated from Maryland and live in the heart of ACC country in Raleigh (Surrounded by Duke, Carolina, and NC State–God help me). But I have to say, there has been an eerie silence in this normally ACC-centric town this year. Pretty weak showing overall.

That said, I’m going to be a homer here, and talk up my Alma Mater. I think Maryland has a real shot to take it deep this year. With a good showing in the ACC tourney, the Terps could earn themselves as high as a 3 or 4 seed, and in the right bracket that might just give them a window to bust past the sweet 16. Beyond that, it’s anybody’s guess. If (and I do mean if) they make it deep, Greivis Vasquez could be a contender. There are few players in the tourney who mean as much to their team as he does, and traditionally teams with a strong scorer like Vasquez fare well in the tourney. Fear the turtle.

OK, back to objectivity now. More than likely, the MVP could be between two senior leaders (again depending on who goes deep) Sherron Collins of Kansas, and Scottie Reynolds of Villanova. Who do you have?

Josh: Hands down, John Wall from Kentucky. The Freshman Phenom and everyone else in that organization knew he’d be one-and-done in the NCAA before getting picked up in the pros, so this is their best shot at a title before he moves on to mansions and shoe endorsements. I think Kentucky is going to be the main challenger to Kansas, and he’s the biggest reason why.

Kyle: You’ve definitely got a point with Wall. I’ve tried this whole time not to even mention the word Kentucky, but there you have it, you baited me into it. I guess I just feel like they represent too much of what’s wrong with college basketball, and not much of what’s right about it.

But that’s the beauty of the NCAA tournament. Each year, hidden amid a 64-team bracket you’ll find teams you love to hate, and you’ll learn to love teams you’d never even heard of. There will be no shortage of storylines, drama, and blood-pressure-rocketing action. So hold onto your sneakers. We’ll be back after the selection show.

This is an awesome post from The Tipping Glass

This is Madness! 2010 March Madness Preview

BioShock 2: Too Much of a Good Thing

Kyle — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 19:22:10 +0000

When the first installment of BioShock was released in 2007, I wasn’t quite sure what I was getting into when I picked it up. The hype for the game was impressive, and since I am a huge fan of forward-thinking first person shooters (FPS), I had reserved a copy.

The concept seemed cool: Your character, surviving a plane crash, drifts upon a mysterious entrance to Rapture, an underwater city founded in the 1960’s to escape the status quo of societal norms. The city recruited the brightest scientific minds of the day to experiment freely within its walls. But soon you find the darker side of this dystopian society.

Everything about the game was phenomenal. From a pure game-play standpoint, it was almost a new class of game altogether. It blended the role playing game (RPG) and FPS genres seamlessly to the point that you weren’t even sure which you were playing, but it didn’t matter. The only thing that mattered was that you couldn’t stop playing. The new open world format for the shooter gave players the choice to explore freely and tackle objectives as they chose. The game was also open-ended, a characteristic you would find in all good RPGs, allowing the choices that the player makes throughout the game to have a direct impact on how it all ends.

Graphically, the game was innovative in its use of nostalgic realism, and the use of water and color throughout the game was impressive. I was sucked in from the first hour, and in terms of total game-play hours, it was far from a let down. There’s nothing more disappointing than a great game that sucks you in just in time to realize that you’ve beaten it in a week. BioShock didn’t disappoint. Boasting an average game-play time that nearly doubles some other notable titles, it seemed this game had found a winning formula of exploration, strategy, and action.

The result was a game with a deep immersive story that you really felt a part of as the player (as you’ll find in any RPG worth its salt), while never for a moment loosing the intense action of a good FPS. Even the mood and feel of the game were impressive: scary at points and dark in tone, but not restricted to the ‘horror game’ niche. Aesthetically the game carries a retro feel—accomplished in character costumes, setting, and sound—while remaining somewhat futuristically themed. All things considered, the bar had been raised. BioShock was named “Game of the Year” by IGN, and in past game reviews I have even humbly dubbed it “the best game ever created.”

So with all the success of the first title, the release of BioShock 2 in February 2010 was much anticipated. There was good reason to expect good things from this game. Forums had been buzzing about it for some time. The developers, 2k Games, had remained extremely tight-lipped about the details of the sequel which made the scene ripe for speculation. I saw rumors that the new game would be set in New York. False. A host of other rumors online turned out to be false as well.

So, could they really top their first effort? I hate to say it, but, no.

Let me start by saying this: I’m not disappointed because it’s not a good game—or even because it’s that much worse than the first one. It is a good game, but I guess what is frustrating is that it’s exactly the same game as the first.

Sure, your character is different, and there are plenty of storyline changes. There are some new allies and new enemies. You spend some time outside the walls of Rapture underwater. There are some new plot twists and revelations. But the bulk of the sequel is almost exactly the same as the first.

Same abilities, same basic weapons, same ammos—O.K., redundant but forgivable—but same levels? Now basically we just have the same game. I wasn’t necessarily surprised when I saw that the game returned you to Rapture, the same underwater city setting as the first game. The setting was part of the allure of the first title. It was part of what made the game unique. But I was surprised when I started playing and instantly recognized that at least portions of levels were exactly as they appeared in the original. The whole thing comes off as (forgive me) lazy. There could have been more new areas of the city that we never got to explore in the first game. There could have been new abilities and weaponry that we never got to unleash. They are few and far between.

The designers did address the one major gap in the original by including an online multi-player mode in BioShock 2. The one knock (and I do mean one) on the original was that you couldn’t play it online at all. No co-op, no multiplayer, no nothing. It was strictly a single player story game, and nowadays that alone can make a title seem dated.

A sequel should carry the same feel as the original. The tone and mood should carry through seamlessly from one title to the next. But the challenge in creating any sequel, regardless of the medium, is how to keep it fresh. The problem with BioShock 2 is that it ignores this fundamental question. The sequel should be a close cousin of the original, not an identical twin, not a ‘dolly the sheep.’ In this case, I feel like they slapped a new cover on a game I’d already played and charged me full price for it again.

The shame here is that BioShock was a game-changer. It was a game that changed the gold standard for all great shooters—that gave game designers a new way to think about what a good shooter should be. The shame is that the sequel to the game that changed so much, changed almost nothing. The sequel to the most forward-thinking game I’d ever played, failed to even take one step away from the original. The problem is not that the sequel isn’t a good game, but that’s because it is virtually the same game. Period. It’s too much of exactly the same good thing.

This is an awesome post from The Tipping Glass

BioShock 2: Too Much of a Good Thing

How to keep your man happy…and your woman irritated (New video game release previews for holiday season ‘09)

The Maruchan Candidate

Kyle — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 15:01:30 +0000

When the Supreme Court ruled that there would be no restrictions on political campaign contributions from corporations, unions, special interest groups, and well…whoever else wants to get into a candidate’s pockets for that matter, free enterprise reached new legal heights in this country. Today you can buy your own candidate.

Just when you thought laissez faire capitalism was under the gun, and campaign reform might be around the corner, the Supreme Court hits us with a curve that would make Tim Lincecum jealous (bad baseball jokes, anyone?).

So if you wanted campaign reform? Well, you got it. All jokes aside, if this ruling stands, the game has completely changed in Washington.

The backlash has been stiff, and in a dramatic change of pace, both parties have been somewhat united in their criticism. Yes, in a time when partisanship is at an all time high and disagreement across party lines has verged on Parliament-style fisticuffs at times, it seems that for the most part the parties get along in opposition to this one. Those in Washington who seem to like the outcome of the ruling have generally stayed quietly in the background.

A recent ABC News / Washington Post poll might suggest why. The decision, it turns out, is massively unpopular in the general public. More than 80% of Americans said they oppose the Supreme Court decision. That kind of number is almost unheard of in a political poll.

But I’m not here to pick sides. No, I’m just here to make observations. Just here to look across the political landscape and paint you a picture.

A very likely scenario that could play out in coming elections is that certain candidates will end up with primary funding sources—be they corporations, unions, or special interest groups—that will essentially bankroll their campaigns. Allow me to artfully construct some of the possibilities:

The Political Pipeline Candidate, R-WY
Primary campaign contributor: Exxon
Campaign credit line: $365.5 million
About the candidate:

The Political Pipeline Candidate grew up in Alaska. Over the course of his life, he invested his profits from the Alaska Permanent Fund in high-risk oil speculations that eventually amassed him a fortune. He is an uncompromising man. He now owns a ranch in Wyoming and has invested heavily in the state’s blossoming natural gas industry.

He signed with Exxon for the 2010 Senatorial election, on a staunch conservative platform. The record-breaking contract included a stunning million dollars for every day of the election year, with an extra half-million dollar signing bonus thrown in for travel expenses. Early reports suggested that the company added the half million to avoid ‘non-monetary campaign donation’ violations which could have resulted if they would have simply provided him with trips on corporate jets. Other stipulations of the contract include a clause which states that for the duration of the campaign he must keep a well-trimmed handlebar mustache, mandatory photo ops with Daniel Day-Lewis, and a bonus if he wins requiring T. Boone Pickens to build a stadium for the acceptance speech.

The Red White and Green Candidate, D-OR
Primary campaign contributor: Siemens
Campaign credit line: $97 million
About the candidate:

With a stump slogan like “It’s not easy being green, but we’re not going green because it’s easy,” this candidate’s intentions are clear. Born and raised in Portland, OR, she comes to the table with big plans for energy reform, sustainability, and green technology.

Once marginalized as a single-issue candidate, she received a huge boost when she was granted a nearly $100 million endorsement from Siemens, the modern industrial behemoth, looking to capitalize on growing demand for green energy. With over $1 billion invested in green energy and smart grid technologies, Siemens jumped on board with the Oregon Congresswoman, calling the partnership “a symbiotic relationship” in which Siemens could establish itself as a major player in the green energy sector with a political face in Washington, and the Democrat from Oregon could assert herself as a serious political contender with the kind of financial backing that no previous “green” candidate has been able to muster from the relatively small startup companies that dominate the green energy marketplace.

Already the move has created controversy in the environmental community, as spontaneous protests have formed outside of Siemens’ oil and gas plants around the country. When asked to comment on how this outcry could affect her campaign, she said: “Who would have thought environmental groups could be so difficult to please?”

The Maruchan Candidate, L-OH
Primary campaign contributor: Maruchan
Campaign credit line: $33,500
About the Candidate:

Not to be confused with “The Manchurian Candidate,” the 1960’s film about a brainwashed assassin, this fiscally frugal candidate is breaking ground and making waves in the two-party system. The new realities of corporate campaign sponsorship presented deep philosophical dilemmas for this newcomer on the political scene. For this Libertarian from Akron, OH, running on a party platform that preaches “Smaller government, lower taxes, more freedom,” the new political realities presented a potential slippery slope of conflicted interests.

He hit the political scene with a message of strict conservative fiscal policy. And from the gun, his eyes have been set on the Representative seat for the 13th Congressional District of Ohio. After much deliberation with his staff about whether to take any sort of major corporate campaign sponsorship, they decided to reach out to companies that represented the kind of economic responsibility that he was campaigning for.

“To be honest, we didn’t exactly have companies knocking down our door to contribute,” he said. “So we decided to reach out, and when Maruchan came back with their offer, everyone was excited. I feel like it really speaks to our college base.” The ramen noodle company chipped in just a fraction of what some of the major corporate giants have put forward—a fact that hardly concerns this eager young politician. “We are Libertarians, and someone gave us money! We’ll take what we can get, and you watch, we’ll make it stretch.” And ironically enough, we are actually watching.

God bless America. Or what’s left of it, anyway.

This is an awesome post from The Tipping Glass

The Maruchan Candidate

Biltmore: Asheville’s answer to aristocracy

Kyle — Fri, 19 Feb 2010 20:00:11 +0000

It all began with a $100 loan in the 1800’s. An investment which would prove one of the most profitable in American history, and would ultimately lead me to Asheville, NC for one incredible weekend.

The loan went to Cornelius Vanderbilt of Staten Island, NY. The lender—his mother. And while $100 might not seem like a hefty sum to lend to your son these days, consider this: $100 was equivalent to the average yearly wage in New York City at the time, and Cornelius was only 16 years old.

He invested the money in a ferry and started a business transporting passengers back and forth from Manhattan. The business grew until he’d made a million dollars back on each dollar his mother had lent him. In today’s dollars, that $100 million equates to well over $1 billion. The fleet of steamships he amassed throughout his career earned him the nickname “The Commodore.” He passed the nickname on to the university he founded.

Two generations later the family had built the nation’s railroad system from scratch, and solidified their status as the richest industrialists in the world.

Last weekend my wife and I visited their country cottage. Their 8,000-acre, 250-room, ridiculously-scaled country cottage. Quaint.

Tucked into the gorgeous Blue Ridge Mountains of western North Carolina, you’ll find the palatial Biltmore estate just outside of the young, hip city of Asheville, about 20 miles from the Carolina-Tennessee border.

Those who aren’t familiar with the area probably wouldn’t associate the region with mountainous terrain, but the peaks of the Blue Ridge and Great Smokey mountain ranges are some of the tallest in the East, and offer a stunning backdrop to the dramatic beauty of Biltmore.

The house embodies a uniquely European feel with its intricately terraced façade, and precariously steep-pitched roofs which are tinted slightly Carolina blue as if intended to blend perfectly into the foam blue-grey hues of the mountain backdrop. It is the distinctly American answer to Europe’s aristocratic chateaus, manors, and villas—just as the Vanderbilt’s were the distinctly capitalist answer to Europe’s aristocracy.

George Washington Vanderbilt, Cornelius’ grandson, commissioned the plans to build the Biltmore estate, and construction began in 1889. The cast of contributors reads like an American history text. Richard Morris Hunt, America’s foremost architect of the era designed Biltmore house. Hunt also designed the pedestal for the Statue of Liberty, and the Metropolitan Museum of Art, in NY. Frederic Law Olmsted, who famously designed Manhattan’s Central Park, was the landscape architect of Biltmore’s estate grounds and gardens. While the average home of the time didn’t have electricity or running water, George’s friend Thomas Edison saw to it that Biltmore boasted electric lighting throughout—even underwater in the 10-foot deep indoor swimming pool in the basement. To this day, Biltmore is still the largest private residence in the country.

There is an innate sense of flawlessness in the setting, where fast-running streams flow alongside estate roads which wind through sprawling oaks, tall pines, and bamboo (which actually is native to the region). This is a place of time-shift, where the mystique enchants you. Your car becomes a carriage as you twist through the valleys, passing open cultivated clearings and mountain vistas. Your North Face fleece becomes a dinner jacket and coat-tails; your favorite baseball cap, a top-hat. It is a place where you don’t have to be high-society, or act that way; you’re just made to feel that way. For the weekend, you are a Vanderbilt.

Today, the old estate house is a museum, but you can find all of the old world grandeur and hospitality at the Inn on Biltmore Estate—a four star, four diamond resort located on the grounds.

The Biltmore estate is also home to the most visited winery in the world. Just up the scenic estate road from the inn, sits the Biltmore Winery. This charming, Tuscan-style building hosts tours and tastings that are included in most weekend packages. Biltmore’s well-renowned wines have won a good deal of acclaim and are actually quite modestly priced in most categories at the winery.

Biltmore is most popular during the spring, fall, and Christmas seasons, but is no less beautiful in any. Each spring the estate launches its “Festival of Flowers,” where the entire estate garden complex, comprising of vast acres manicured grounds, is carpeted in flowers. I’ve only seen pictures. It looks absolutely surreal. It looks fake, honestly, because the colors and design seem too incredible to be alive. The fall is popular mostly because the changing of the leaves in autumn creates a spectacular landscape, enhancing the already inspiring views. “Christmas at Biltmore” carries on the long-standing Vanderbilt tradition of holding elaborate Christmas Eve celebrations at the estate with the cream of society from all over the country and the world. Each year the entire estate is decked out with miles of garland, over 30 Christmas trees, and authentic turn-of-the century decorations to recreate the authentic feel of the Vanderbilt family tradition.

January and February are definitely off-season at the Biltmore (with the exception of the weeks surrounding Valentines Day), but that means that you can also score some good deals on packages during that time. There is no ‘cheap’ time to visit Biltmore, only ‘less expensive’ times. Some of the packages which you can get at a discounted rate this time of year do have some nice perks though.

My wife and I opted for the bed and breakfast package which included free access to all of the estate grounds and activities available during the winter (good all day Friday, Saturday, and Sunday), and it included a free gourmet breakfast (literally the fanciest breakfast I’d ever eaten) at the inn which you could even swap for room service breakfast in bed if you wanted. The package alone ran about $630 for the weekend at the discounted rate. If you’re interested, ask when you register if they have any un-booked suites. We got our room upgraded to a balcony suite for very little on top since they had one open.

Make no mistake, Asheville is a mountain town, and despite being in the South, it is prone to mountain weather. But for those of us who enjoy the winter that can be a plus.

When we arrived at the Biltmore, we were expecting some snow. The news forecasted a winter storm headed across the state that weekend. A quick check online earlier that week predicted about 6 inches in Asheville. We got about a foot that Friday. The snow started dumping on Asheville five minutes after we arrived and sat down for lunch.

The snowy weekend made for an intimate, relaxed setting. We were snowed in on Friday, so we hung out at the lobby bar. We made friends that night that we ended up hanging out with pretty much the entire weekend.

Don’t forget to visit Asheville if you do head out to the Biltmore. This up and coming, artsy, bohemian, urban metropolis is definitely worth checking out. It’s a sort of Boulder, CO of the East if you can imagine that. Nestled in the mountains, it is a small city with a unique atmosphere of fun friendly people.

A recent study actually rated Asheville ‘the happiest city in America.’ It was a stat that I was curious to observe. What exactly makes a place happy? I don’t know. But somehow, even after being there for such a short time, I think I agree with the assessment.

Half of Asheville was shut down because of the snow when we ventured out with our new friends Saturday night. A quick note about NC cities: they don’t believe in plowing or salting the roads. Not even the ones in the mountains. We went ice dancing in a 4-Runner that night. There was a grade school snow day festive sort of atmosphere at the bars and restaurants that we visited in Ashville. It was contagious.

In the end, it’s not the destination—not even the journey—that makes a trip really mean something. It’s the memories we take away from it all. I get the sense that I won’t be forgetting this weekend getaway anytime soon.

This is an awesome post from The Tipping Glass

Biltmore: Asheville’s answer to aristocracy

Spotlight on: Charlottesville Virginia

A half-what?!: I have a method

Kyle — Wed, 17 Feb 2010 15:34:17 +0000

The following is the fourth in a series of posts that chronicle Kyle’s training for the Raleigh Rocks Half Marathon in Raleigh, NC. Will he stick with it? Will he fail miserably for the amusement of all who read? Will he jump on stage and smash a guitar, eight miles into the race and be arrested? Will he leave it all—including his breakfast—out on the beautiful streets of downtown Raleigh and finish? Read on to find out.

With the first run debacle over with, it was time to take a more realistic approach. I had tried the baseless self-confidence route, and let’s just say I wasn’t going to will my way through a half-marathon. The agony endured on the first run equated to an addict’s dose of humility.

It was time for realism. The notion that the triumph of the human spirit would somehow take a completely out of shape 26-year-old and immediately summon the endurance in him to soldier painlessly through three miles faded into fantasy. The youthful excitement over the new mission at hand gave way to the realization that if I really was going to make this happen, it was going to be a long tough road. A road on which my heel had only just landed, and I hadn’t even finished the first step.

So if obtrusive naivety wouldn’t work—if the boyish reasoning that one could simply conquer any distance he dared was an unrealistic approach—then what exactly was the plan? I had a long way to go, and a base of only mushy cellulosic tissue to build upon. I needed some kind of strategy. Some kind of method to get me from here to there.

Next up was the weekend run. The big guy—four miles on Saturday. The training schedule I was now the victim of consisted of four runs a week. Medium distance runs Mondays and Thursdays, shorter distance runs Wednesdays, and long distance runs on Saturdays. It would be my first long distance run overall (as if the three miles I’d utterly failed in attempting that Thursday wasn’t long enough).

There was, admittedly, no way I way that I was going to be able to run four miles that weekend. Whatever false aspirations I might have once harbored about being able to persist running through such distances had been crushed earlier that week. I decided that the reality of the situation was what it was. If I wasn’t in good enough shape to run four miles then I would have to find a way to get into that kind of shape. And if I couldn’t run four miles, I would have to find a way to make it four miles one way or the other.

I resolved to run as far as I could that day. To run until the hyperventilated gasps were too much to handle, but I also resolved not to quit after that. No, this was not the same manifestation of foolish pride that arose earlier that week. Not the bull-headed self-gratifying naïve persistence. When I exhausted and couldn’t run anymore I would walk, but come hell or high water, I would make it four miles that day. There would be no out road. Strike rule number one from the record.

I tried to take note of the lessons I’d learned in my first failed attempt. For one, the ridiculous pace I’d started with that day all but guaranteed that I wouldn’t finish. I thought back to a conversation I had with my dad. His brother was a marathoner and is an avid runner to this day. My dad told me about a conversation he’d had with one of the guys my uncle used to run marathons with.

“Yeah, I run marathons,” he said. “But see, I have a method. I start slow…and then I ease up.”

And just like that, I had a method.

Check back soon for more installments of Kyle’s illustrious half-marathon training. Assuming he does not hyperventilate and die mid-training, this series will monitor Kyle’s torturous journey right up to the Raleigh Rocks Half Marathon on March 27, 2010. Stay tuned.

This is an awesome post from The Tipping Glass

A half-what?!: I have a method

Progressive Relevance: The Vancouver Olympics

Kyle — Fri, 12 Feb 2010 17:56:54 +0000

If you live on the east coast of the US, this year you’ve seen your share of snow. With record snowfalls across the Northeast and Mid Atlantic regions, cities are blanketed, roads are skating rinks, and grocery stores are pre-winter-storm war zones. I heard somewhere that just the first blizzard to hit D.C. this winter put the metro area 20 inches over its average.

If you live in Vancouver this year, you might be jealous. Not because you love snow so much. No, I’m sure the Canucks in Vancouver have seen enough snow to satisfy them for a lifetime. But it just so happens that the Winter Olympic Games kick off this weekend in Vancouver, and snowfall there is verging on record lows. Reports are stating that many of the events at lower altitudes, like many of the snowboard and half-pipe events, could have to deal with particularly adverse conditions if snowfall doesn’t pick up in the next couple of weeks.

At some point in this ubiquitously interconnected world—whether you like it or not—you have to come to terms with the fact that perception is reality. Or so it seems, at least. It’s the manicured sizzle on a plastic steak. It’s the punditry, not the point.

If you believe what you’ve heard about the Winter Olympics so far this year (at least in the U.S.), it’s a wonder they’re even going to go through with them. Sports commentators in virtually every medium have been chiming in with their talking points and criticisms.

The brush of negative press started with an unlikely source. NBC, the network with an exclusive contract to broadcast the Summer and Winter Olympics, announced that it will likely lose money on its coverage of the Vancouver games. An avalanche of negative press about the Winter Olympics followed. Now the snow shortage in the host city is just throwing salt in the wound.

You can be made to believe a lot of things. NBC would have you believe that ‘the diffusion of audiences’ with all of the specialized entertainment options available has led to decreased interest in audiences and advertisers in such a broad sports outlet, catering to what they would call ‘a niche market’ of viewers.

I don’t buy it. The Super Bowl blew the ‘diffusion of audiences’ argument out of the water this year with the largest audience in television history (though admittedly, ad revenues did slump a bit), and all of the same entertainment options were available at that time slot.

Really? Is it possible? The Olympics were once a staple of American television every four years, with ratings that rivaled the championships of major sports. So could it really be that this household institution had devolved into a net loss for its broadcasters?

For me, this is a tough pill to swallow. I love the Winter Olympics. And if I had to pick between the summer and winter games it would be an easy pick for the winter. But remember, perception is reality. As soon as NBC announced that it would likely lose money on the games, it assured that it would. The same rules apply on Wall Street and Madison Ave. Now as we see, they also hold true at Rockefeller Center.

It’s no wonder to me that NBC stands to lose revenue on the Vancouver games. The network has tried to sell out the Olympics as a glorified figure skating competition with a few other events that they believe no one cares about inconspicuously listed somewhere in the fine print below the sequins and man makeup.

I’m not knocking figure skating. There’s no doubt that it is the big ratings draw of the winter games and probably always will be. But it just seems like NBC has considered it the only selling point of the games, and ignored everything else it has to offer.

The reason I enjoy the Winter Olympics more than the Summer is simple: it’s more exciting, and it’s more progressively relevant.

Let’s start with excitement. Be honest, how many times can you watch a runner lap around a track without changing the channel? How about a swimmer going back and forth in a pool? Or a crew team rowing a boat in a straight line down a river? For me the answer is three—as in it takes me three seconds to realize what I’m watching and find something interesting to watch.

You could argue that each of these summer events has a winter equivalent, and you would have a point. But I think that there are notable exceptions in the events that tend to be featured in the winter games. For instance, there is a long distance cross-country skiing event that might seem like the most boring event you could imagine, until you realize that at set points in the event, the athletes pick up guns and fire at targets. Time penalties are assessed according to accuracy. Why is it that guns just seem to make anything more interesting?

There is also an element of speed, danger, and adrenaline in the winter games that you just won’t find in the summer. Downhill skiers teeter on the very edge of control and achieve ridiculous speeds. There are events with names like “the skeleton” where very unintelligent human beings lay down face first on a bladed sled the size of a Radio Flyer and hurl themselves down a track that is a sheet of ice with 90 degree banked turns. There is an ever-present excitement of not knowing when the big crash will send a person flopping down the mountain like a rag doll, but knowing it’s coming soon.

As for relevance: there is no better juxtaposition of pure simple relevance than hockey in winter and baseball in summer. Whereas baseball was recently excluded from the summer games because everyone realized that the best players in the game weren’t even playing in the Olympics, the NHL shuts down mid-season for weeks so that its players can represent their countries. There is nothing more relevant than a grudge match between true professionals when national pride is on the line. With all due respect to the athletes, there is little less relevant than college stand-ins taking over an unpaid competition that their rich prima donna counterparts are to busy for, or are simply “contractually unable to compete. Hockey’s status in the Winter Olympics is good for the sport, the Olympics, and the NHL. And before you go there, the NBA is off-season during the Summer Olympics—it’s not the same.

Then there is progressive relevance. The Winter Olympics has not been afraid of change. They have not shied away from the youthful energy of the extreme sports world. Snowboarding, extreme skiing, and the half-pipe events have become some of the most popular at the winter games almost instantly. Suddenly the stars of the Winter Olympics are young, energetic, and cool. Not because the Olympic Committee planned it that way, but because the public couldn’t get enough of it. Shaun White went to Torino four years ago as a domestically popular X-Games star to a narrow market. He left Torino an international superstar, a household name, and the new face of the US Olympic Team.

But perhaps the sad truth in all of this is that NBC has failed to recognize any of it. It has failed to take what it learned in Torino and run with it. It has certainly failed to capitalize on its potential. Worst of all, it has stopped even trying to sell it. When was the last time you saw a promo for the Winter Olympics? It seems like they’ve stopped even trying.

For the network ranked dead-last among the four majors, NBC obviously has its work cut out for it. I dare say it begs the question: if the Winter Olympics has found a way to become progressively relevant, and you can’t find a way to sell it, what does that say about how relevant you are? Anyway I’ll be watching, even if perception is reality.

This is an awesome post from The Tipping Glass

Progressive Relevance: The Vancouver Olympics

Summer in Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada

A half-what?!: Rule number five

Kyle — Mon, 08 Feb 2010 19:28:49 +0000

The following is the third in a series of posts that chronicle Kyle’s training for the Raleigh Rocks Half Marathon in Raleigh, NC. Will he stick with it? Will he fail miserably for the amusement of all who read? Will he jump on stage and smash a guitar, eight miles into the race and be arrested? Will he leave it all—including his breakfast—out on the beautiful streets of downtown Raleigh and finish? Read on to find out.

I was out the door running. All of the anticipation had led up to this.

On the advice of council (namely, my wife), I had plotted my course carefully to include an escape route by which I could cut the 3mi. run in half if the situation became dire.

Rule number one: always leave yourself an out. Better to live and fight another day than go down in a blaze of cardiac arrest. Why is it that a woman’s reason so often outmatches a man’s bullheaded self confidence?

The wind gusted headlong in my face as I turned the corner onto the sidewalk across the street from my house. It was a brutal omen of things to come. I’d checked the thermostat in my car on the way home from work. It was 28 degrees then. It had only gotten darker and colder since. I wondered while driving what it was going to feel like trying to run in this. The wind answered that question with a quick, definitive, wisp. It was taunting me to turn around.

It was doubting me. Testing my resolve. The wind knew that I was mere steps away from my warm, welcoming front door, and my nose and ears already stiffened and tingled like they do when you’ve been skiing all day. It was questioning whether I really had it in me, like when my wife smirked before I went out the door, or the way my brother had started the email with “I probably know the answer to this…”

I picked up the pace. I turned the corner and headed down the next street. My breathing picked up. My chest tightened.

Rule number two: don’t pick up the pace because you think you are stronger than the difficult conditions. You aren’t. This rule is particularly true when you have not run in about a year, and the conditions happen to be particularly difficult at the moment. I tend to learn things the hard way.

The wind eventually calmed to disastrously frigid breeze. I backed off to the pace that I guess I had always run at. I could feel my heart rate through my sternum, and breathing had evolved into desperate wheezing gasps.

Rule number three: whatever pace you have run at before you tried to run three miles, is probably much faster than you ought to try running if you actually intend to make it three miles. Check.

I had studied the map before leaving to know exactly where each mile marker was. What I’d planned as a rewarding set of milestones to mark my accomplishments began to seem like depressing reminders of the distance left between where I was and just how far away they were. I hadn’t even made it a mile yet.

This is where the coughing starts, the nose runs, and everything else goes predominantly wrong. You reach a certain point of exhaustion when you’re as out of shape as I was, where every second’s thoughts become tangled in chest-heaving gulps for air and the occasional unintended snot rocket. I’d heard of the runner’s high that people who consistently conquer the types of distances that I was now training for talk about. I’m pretty sure at that moment I stumbled upon the antithesis of that concept, and plunged face first into the runner’s low.

I started looking for my out, as stated in rule number one. It was time to let foolish pride give way to reason, and accept the fact that your wife was right—you should have started with a mile.

Due to the fatigue-induced delirium I’d begun to experience (or perhaps just the onset of hypothermia as the wind pierced my sweat-soaked layers), I had already made one wrong turn, but thanks to the fact that I hadn’t run very far at all at this point, I knew I was headed in the right direction. I had to be about 3/4mi. into it at this point, but somewhere amid the freezing wind, pitch black skies, and runner’s low, the name of my out road had totally slipped my mind. The bitter disbelief that there is no way I hadn’t made it to the out road yet took over.

Rule number four: while in the runner’s low, disregard what you thought you knew before leaving. You won’t remember.

I was getting desperate. The wheezing gasps were beginning to sound more like pathetic cries for help. I made an impulsive left turn and got lucky. Not the out road I’d planned on, actually the street before it. I hadn’t even made it to my shortcut, but the time for pride was long past.

Just over a mile into it, I conceded. The chest convulsions now totally out of control, I erred on the side of self-preservation, and slowed to a walk. When my breathing returned to a reasonably safe rhythm I picked up to a jog again, and went back and forth running and walking until finally I reached the warm, climate-controlled safety of home.

I was a hot mess when I stumbled in the door—soaked in sweat, freezing, sucking wind, and coughing uncontrollably. Like I was coughing up a year of unhealthy decisions.

Round one goes to the elements. I didn’t make it three miles. I didn’t even make to the out road. But I ran, and finished.

Rule number five: when you finish, tell yourself it won’t be so bad next time. Eventually, it won’t even be a lie.

Stay tuned.

This is an awesome post from The Tipping Glass

A half-what?!: Rule number five

A half-what?!: Prep time

Kyle — Tue, 26 Jan 2010 18:04:31 +0000

The following is the second in a series of posts that chronicle Kyle’s training for the Raleigh Rocks Half Marathon in Raleigh, NC. Will he stick with it? Will he fail miserably for the amusement of all who read? Will he jump on stage and smash a guitar, eight miles into the race and be arrested? Will he leave it all-including his breakfast-out on the beautiful streets of downtown Raleigh and finish? Read on to find out.

The day had changed dramatically in a very short period of time. I had already clicked send and the email was off. There was no turning back now. It was prep time.

For some reason I felt butterflies in my stomach, like there was some kind of dramatic anticipation of all that I was about to embark on. Or maybe just foreshadowing of the nausea that was almost certainly going to hit about a quarter mile into my first run later that day.

I pulled up the training schedule. Hah, see that, I had a training scheduled. I looked down at my anxiously fluttering stomach. I needed one.

It was Thursday, three miles. This is the point where false confidence sets in. The point where the pragmatic realist and the anxious optimist stand on either shoulder and fight it out like the Bad Girls Club. They collide dead center in your head and you sit back and listen to the whole thing go down.

Do you really think that after a multi-year workout sabbatical, you are going to be able to just step out the door and run three miles? …Honestly?

You’ve got to start somewhere though, and you aren’t going to make it to a half-marathon without pushing yourself. Come-on, your already almost a week behind on the training. Man up.

Push yourself?! Listen, if you make it half of those three miles, someone is going to be pushing you on a stretcher.

And so on.

After much thought, I resolved to go for it. Three miles. It even sounded stupid. Now, for you marathoners and avid runners out there, this might sound like peanuts to you. But bear with me here folks. This is coming from a guy who really hasn’t been in shape since about half way through college-and just how fit he was then is debatable.

With the question of distance resolved, next step was to determine exactly where the hell I had to go to make it that far. I guess I never really figured I’d have to deal with this problem so I didn’t even know where to start.

My brother suggested mapmyrun.com. I started there. Once I had dredged my way through the muddied mess of ads on the site, and created an account for myself, I began the process of not knowing what the hell I was doing. I set my starting point at my house and went looking for where I select my distance (a stunning 3 miles) so that the site would conveniently plot my run for me. Wrong. I called my brother. Turns out you have to click your way around the map to set your own route, and it just tracks the distance. Figures, the running website won’t let you be lazy. An hour later I had a perfect three mile loop around my neighborhood that started and ended at my driveway. I was as ready as I’d ever be.

I remember thinking to myself that day that for the first time in my life I was actually excited about running. I was looking forward to it. I had a lot of reasons not to. An arctic front had been whipping through the south bringing uncharacteristically frigid temperatures to Raleigh. Each morning that week it had been in the low 20’s driving into work. The wind had been kicking up all day, and all signs pointed to this being a seriously cold outing. I didn’t let myself think about it.

I plunged through my work to make sure I wouldn’t get caught up late at the office. I wanted to get started running as early as possible.

The phone rang. It was my boss. Impromptu meeting. Awesome. It was the kind of meeting that gets everyone called in at the last second cause the big guy’s got a problem that he doesn’t even know where to start with, and in the long run the meeting never really gets started, and seems like it will never end.

It was pitch black and freezing by the time I got home.

I told my wife about the day’s revelation. She already knew. Jess, our sister-in-law had called her and gave her all of the details. I think she knew more about the story than I did. Word travels fast in my family.

My wife was excited in the way that I guess all wives are excited when their husbands resolve to get in shape. She disagreed with my assessment of how far to run though.

“Maybe you should start with a mile honey.”

She smirked. Smirked! How dare she question my commitment to this grand cause before I’d even run a step. I’d show her.

“Go big or go home, baby. I’m going big.”

She chuckled a bit and tried to hide it. “See you when you get home.”

This is an awesome post from The Tipping Glass

A half-what?!: Prep time